Hold Me Tight Beats Cards and Candy

Ah, here it comes: you no sooner recover from Christmas spending and it’s February. Valentine’s Day is the fifth biggest spending holiday on the calendar in America, so get out your wallet. We will spend upwards of 26 billion (that’s “B”—billion!) dollars this year to say, “I love you” to that special one. Cards, candy, flowers, jewelry, dinner out, who knows? The sky’s the limit. And it isn’t a waste—it’s always great to say (and hear) “I love you.” But, it can get old. It can get tired. And you might rightfully wonder, “Does it make a difference? Does it last?”
Cards get thrown away. Candy only puts on the pounds. Flowers wilt and die. 

Hold Me Tight is for Any Couple

How about giving and receiving something that lasts, something that could change your relationship for good? Come to a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat in Florida. Hold Me Tight®️ is truly a gift that keeps on giving, long after cards and candy are gone and forgotten. Hold Me Tight®️ is a two day retreat for committed couples at any age or stage: dating, living together, newlywed, long time married, couples in crisis or just trying to make a good thing better. Hold Me Tight®️ fits almost any couple.

Learn and Grow Together

Hold Me Tight®️ will teach you about your relationship and yourself. It is rooted in the fascinating tenets of attachment science and a model called Emotionally Focused Therapy. But, Hold Me Tight®️ is not therapy. It is learning and interacting, not only with other couples, but most of all, with your partner. Since our group is often very diverse, each couple goes at their own pace. No one is put on the spot. It isn’t “pass” or “fail.” We learn together and then give you time to practice with your partner—practice new conversations that lead to greater intimacy and connection than you ever thought possible.

You will leave understanding how and why you and the one you love most so easily and so often get stuck in the same conflicts. Those conflicts often lead nowhere and leave you wondering why you can’t seem to get out of your own way. When you finally begin to make sense of those “round and round” cycles of conflict, and how to interrupt them, you can change the conversation and create deep connection. 

You leave understanding better what you and partner most need and long for in your relationship. You leave with a priceless road map for getting there and the confidence that your relationship can truly be that safe place we all need to be and do well in life. 

Hold Me Tight®️ is more than learning to “fight fair” or negotiate better. It goes deeper. As you learn the value of empathy and vulnerability in love, you learn to turn towards, not away from or against your partner. You learn truly to team up—together—against any challenge you might face.

A Gift that Keeps on Giving

Hold Me Tight®️ is powerful and has the best track record in the business. Research consistently shows that 70 percent of couples who attend this workshop are doing well as much as two years later. That beats the heck out of cards and candy!

Every year, almost half of all New Year’s resolutions involve improving one’s primary relationship. If that was you this year, here’s your chance. Stop talking about it. The time is now. Do something that proves you care. Do something that lasts. Get in on Hold Me Tight®️.

Join us just outside Orlando on February 9 & 10, the weekend before Valentine’s Day. There’s no time like the present. Sign up right now! 


Have a Safety Plan

Change Your Viewing

By Mark Beck • May 29, 2025
What is the first step to changing our station in life, changing a situation or a relationship? I suggest it starts with changing how we view things, how we look at the problem or the person. Do we see burden or a blessing…obligation or opportunity? Often, when we’re stuck, say, in a difficult relationship, we see our partner as an opponent. He or she is the problem. We may even go find a therapist whom we hope will “fix” our partner. We focus on the other’s weakness, faults and failures, how they let us down and miss the mark. If that is your focus, then the more you look, the more you will see. Most couples who come to me for therapy are so focused on their partner’s problems that they can’t see anything else. They are often stuck in blame and negativity. And what we see informs what we believe. If we see only the bad in our partner, it’s easy to believe that he or she doesn’t love us or that the relationship is hopeless. That’s when couples don’t call me; they call lawyers.

We All Need Predictability

By Mark Beck • April 25, 2025
If you are invested in the stock market, it’s been a roller coaster lately. Indeed, perhaps the best short run strategy is to close your eyes and hold on and ride it out—just like on a roller coaster! However you view the market moves we’re seeing—tariffs and the like—one thing is pretty clear: markets don’t like unpredictability. Uncertainty makes markets very nervous. Hence, lots of ups and downs make for tension and trouble. It’s human nature; unpredictability is stressful in any context.

Safety First

By Mark Beck • April 1, 2025
A local factory required all of its employees to attend a safety class. One fellow didn’t really pay attention and when the final exam at the end of the class asked, “In case of a fire, what steps would you take?” the fellow answered, “Large ones!” “Safety First” is a wise strategy, everywhere from the workplace to the highway to healthcare to childcare. Injuries and accidents cost multiplied billions every year and it’s always better to prevent an accident than to treat one. Whatever the setting, people do better when they feel safe.

Curious or Critical

By Mark Beck • March 14, 2025
Somebody said, “Marriage is a never ending conversation.” I think that’s true. It certainly is a never ending education. That’s part of what makes it fun. Everyday I learn something about my wife, Debbie, about how she sees the world and sees me. And I’m often surprised at our different perspectives. We were on the verge of an argument the other day, simply because we both saw the situation very differently. Neither of us were wrong. But, once I realized how Debbie saw things, I understood her actions and reactions much better. And I realized again that a real key to connection lies in understanding, more than being understood. The late Sue Johnson used to say, “People calm down when they feel understood.” I’ve certainly found that to be true.

Love Is a Team Sport

By Mark Beck • January 29, 2025
If you’re a sports fan (specifically, football) this is your favorite time of year. The NFL playoffs showcase the best of the best and even for the non-fanatics out there, some important truths are evident. Football, like many other sports, is a team game. For sure, individual superstars shine, but only because those around them pull together for a common goal. The best teams operate as one. Eleven players, all on the same page: focused, supportive, picking each other up, pursuing the same goal. When they do, they become more than the sum of their parts…highly efficient. They minimize mistakes and overcome them when they happen. When adversity hits, lesser teams slip into fault finding, sniping and looking out for number one. In any sport, if teammates ever become opponents, they can’t win. It’s game over.

Relationship Rescue

By Mark Beck • January 24, 2025
You might remember the cruise ship Costa Concordia that foundered off the coast of Italy in 2012 after her captain carelessly steered her too close to shore. Rocks tore a 175 foot gash in her hull and the ship listed severely to her starboard side, taking on water and running aground. Ultimately, 32 people died and the recovery cost about $2 billion. Perhaps the greatest blunder though, was that the captain waited over an hour to give the order to abandon ship. For such negligence, he was ultimately convicted of manslaughter and sentenced to 15 years. Indeed, he left the ship with 300 passengers still on board! (He said he “fell” into a lifeboat as it was being lowered.)

Help Is Nearby

By Mark Beck • January 17, 2025
I had a close call today. I was almost duped by a very slick hacker. He posed as a security guy from PayPal and I nearly gave him remote access to my computer. (I know, that sounds pretty stupid on my part.) Fortunately for me, when things smelled fishy, I tapped out before any real damage was done. But, I didn’t know what to do from there. I unplugged my PC and called an expert. He knew just what to do and he got me up and running in no time. What a relief! It cost me a few bucks, but most likely saved me a lot more. Computers are a necessary evil in my life. I can’t even imagine managing my home or my business without one. But, they can sure be troublesome. And a cyber wizard, I am not. That’s my problem. I know just enough to be dangerous. It sure eases my mind that help is available when I need it. Because some things I can’t fix. That doesn’t make me stupid…it’s just not my expertise.

Comfort Isn't Always Comfortable

By Mark Beck • January 10, 2025
Intimate relationships are never easy and too many don’t survive. Courtrooms and counselors’ offices are full of couples who didn’t set out to destroy their love; it just looks as if they did. Maybe you’re one of those couples…trying to figure out how you went from newlywed to nearly dead...and you never saw it coming...or you did and you didn't know how to stop it.
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando is a great way to ring in the new year

Happy New Year

By Mark Beck • January 2, 2025
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando is a great new years resolution

When You Hit Turbulence

By Mark Beck • December 16, 2024
Now and then, I travel by air. I enjoy it, for the most part. But, on one trip, seemingly out of nowhere, the plane hit heavy turbulence. Suddenly, the cabin was shuttering and shaking. I looked outside; the wings were visibly bouncing up and down as the plane lurched and pitched. I tried to hide my fear, but (pardon the pun) it really shook me up. My stomach tightened; my breathing got shallow. I couldn’t think straight. Having such little experience with something like that, I feared we would crash. But, then, I noticed the flight attendants. They were cool as the backside of a pillow…no panic or alarm. I wondered how they could be so calm. Soon the pilot came over the intercom and in a steady, measured voice, explained that turbulence is normal, the plane was built for much, much worse and it would all subside in a few moments. The crew had been through this many times. They understood what was happening and what to do. I was so glad that somebody did! Their calm was contagious. Gradually, I was able to relax and realized that it wasn’t the crisis I had feared it was. That was a game changer. I got through it and now, turbulence isn’t the problem it used to be for me when I fly. It still happens, but I know what it’s about when it does and that gets me through. .
More Posts